|
Far Cry (2008)
IMDB rating: 3.10
Plot: An adaptation of the first-person-shooter video game where Jack Carver, a retired Special Forces Officer who now is transport for hire, by people and cargo. On one particular trip Jack ferries a photographer ‘Val’ who wants to photograph old Japanese WW2 bases on some of the Micronesian islands. He goes through hell when his boat is attacked and destroyed by an unknown party while Val is away. Surviving by the skin of his teeth, he must now find Val and uncover what is truly happening on these dark and mysterious islands.
|
i find online Far Cry and download
Directors: Boll Uwe
Actors: Schweiger Til,Bourdain Anthony,Cooper Scott,Cutshall D. Harlan,Dopud Mike,Fairbrass Craig,Gustafson Geoff,Hanley Thomas,Kennedy Jesse,Kier Udo,McMeekan Kirk,Pare Michael,Skistimas Craig,Smith Kimani Ray,Switch Jamie,Action,Adventure,Drama,
i feel disenchanted with the world because of a pretty tough life?
everyone i know has lead better lives than me, how do i deal with this ?
growing up i was enchanted with life, i was going to do this, and hopefully achieve this etc . - but because of a lot of misfortunes and now reaching the age of 32 -
i dont feel those things anymore , the world to me has turned out to be disappointing in my experience - and ive achieved nothing i wanted so far .
im 32 , have aged in my face, - have minor body disfigurements through accidents years ago, a crooked little finger, 2 missing teeth at the front lower bottom and -
i have to say that my life has turned out rather disappointingly so far . suffered injustices, adversity’s , made critical mistakes , squandered away years , been into prison 11 years back, have a long psychiatric history , behaved in a violent conduct years ago - and as such of all this, i have missed out on a NORMAL life . a life of ; - building relationships with people , being employed , getting qualifications and most other things - the things that matter.
dont get me wrong , my life hasn’t been as bad , compared to some people .
i have obviously survived up to now but its been very difficult to say the least -
the scenario now, more or less is :
ive lived alone for 6 years in a 1 bedrooom flat on disability, owning ‘ few ‘ material belongings - getting help for my difficult psychological problems , accept my diagnosis , hoping to get another test to see if i have anxiety disorders - which i suspect - i see a support worker weekly , which makes me feel like a RETARD because im a 32 year old adult - im hoping to get psychotherapy but have to do the support worker appointments first.
it has been pretty tough for me . - ive survived yes , only through inner strength - but ive achieved NOTHING i wanted to do - and got nothing i hoped for.
i feel insecure about my future , empty, lonely , and a sense of profound loss -
when i browse facebook and see all my old class mates that have done well, seemed to have lived average normal lives , most of them have had partners , have LIVED , travelled , have kids , are in work, enjoying their lives - one pretty blonde girl i remember ‘ louise ‘ - she had a crush on me in school ( back when i was cute and flawless ) - now lives in australia , has a good job -
i saw a picture of her with a big happy smile holding what looked like her little boy , she had sunglasses on and was standing on a sunny street that looked like ‘ ramsey street ‘ from the show ‘ neighbours ‘ - with a blue sky and fluffy clouds in the background.
i felt like crying , seeing reflected back at me the life i always wanted , hoped for , but never got .
a deep sense of loss and sadness engulfing me , in my dark , one bedroomed apartment.
the only things that keep me going are my ‘ remote ‘ dreams , the hope of attaining a good paying computer job, to build meaningful relationships then finally to move to a quiet coastal village near a seaside town somewhere.
but to me, those goals seem impossible.
can anybody feel my sorrow here ? and just ….what will i do type despair ?
first of all you have to realize that you are trying to achieve a fairy tale life in a nightmare world. you seem to be so bitter that you cannot see that you are only 32 and have a chance learn to love yourself and create a better more full filling life in the future. If you are carrying around all this negativity and yearning for what others have, you are not going to move forward and find friends or love,as you are creating a barrier to happiness and fulfillment.If you dont like yourself how do you expect someone else to?
You are lucky enough to have a support worker,a lot of people never receive help for their mental illness. As for labeling yourself a retard, there are a lot of people out there with mental health issues that are living full enjoyable lives and who would disagree with you. You have a problem, you are receiving medication and you are being monitored, the rest is up to you, other people can only do so much for you, the fact that you are 32 is not the factor holding you back, you are a youngster compared to some people who go on courses to gain a better education or even learning to read.
you may have seen a photo of an old girlfriend in a beautiful country and you have assumed that she is happy and living the fairy tale life you yearn for but is she? Do you realize that you are not the only person that has insecurities about life, everyone has hang ups about their body,aging,dying,money worries etc. Everyone has moments of what if? There are people being abused in so called happy marriages and some who are lonely in relationships, the list is endless.
Oh and of course there are the charmed few for whom life seems a dream, even these have their share of problems.
You have been open about your prison stay and your mental health issues and you sound like you have the potential to get out there and create a life for yourself in the world. Through your support worker find classes suited to the goal you want to achieve ie. computers, english, maths etc. It can be daunting, especially if you join a class full of ‘normal’ people, as you would call them but you would benefit from a drop in course for all types of people, these are usually small and you will make friends after a while and you will be gaining an education at the same time. Dont try and rush things, slowly but surely wins the race. work towards your goal, dont be disheartened by any obstacles you might come up against just grit your teeth and carry on. Dont be afraid to ask for help .
Stop looking on the mirror and worrying about the ageing process just think yourself as 32 years young. As for your scars etc. just think of them as lifes battle scars and learn from them,beauty is superficial and even with the most handsome of people looks fade and you dont see you as others see you.
keep telling yourself that this year you are going to grab life and enjoy it to your best of your abilitiy. You can do it. Life can be hard but you have to make it as enjoyable and as productive as you possibly can. Godspeed.
joules | Feb 08, 2010
